Together We Rise

Vulnerability Share:

 

Two years ago I began my journey of trying to get published. I accomplished that and learned so much about myself in the process.

 

See I’ve always prided myself on feeling elation as others stepped into their power, owning their stories, and leaving a footprint- their own unique mark on the world. But during this particular chapter in my life, I began to feel something else and it was ugly. I started comparing myself to others, started having pangs of inadequacy, insecurity, and, well… jealousy.

 

As a person who doesn’t enjoy these types of feels but someone who deeply believes in not bypassing…I decided to lean into the discomfort and embrace these emotions. I gave them security and a voice to be acknowledged. I also stepped away from writing and took a sabbatical.

 

What I concluded was that I questioned my own worth and my own value in the words I wrote. I also learned the true meaning of “ego” and realized how large mine had grown. I also realized I felt competitive with others due to my own sense of a lesser value and a whole lot of stuff came up around my own aging process.

 

See, I kept viewing these beautiful young women doing effortless yoga poses and the like and had the thought, “But how can I complete with that? I’m almost forty, come with some extra padding, am seeing sunspots pop up on my face like a Dalmatian, and can’t get in an awesome headstand. What value do I have?”

 

Throughout this process, I found love for myself and began to accept the soft spots. I came to the realization that I can’t compete with these beauties and needed to learn to love and accept myself as I am- where I am. I realized these young women were not my competitors after all and realized my own value. I also realized we have each walked our own unique path and we all have our own stories. We’ve all lived different lives. I realized I had just as much knowledge and wisdom to share…just from an older- different perspective.

 

Transitioning my thoughts from a negative into a positive made me feel like the greatest Alchemist of all. It also made me question what they were doing that I wanted to accomplish and fueled that as motivation for my own self growth. I also seemed to finally stumble onto a different path that I could recognize as my own.

 

I also had to realize my validation as a human was not tied to how many views, likes, or shares I had…

 

I had to retrain myself to no longer seek my wholeness and value through the eyes and opinions of others.

 

Today, I find myself back at that beautiful space within myself that can honor other women and celebrate their accomplishments without somehow internalizing it into, “Why not me?!” 

 

Today, I feel blessed to know the women I have in my life. Today I am grateful for female connection. Today I feel honored to know such amazing and powerful women.  Women are not my competitors…they are my allies and together, we rise…

No Comments

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.